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    Dare to Live!

    2019 is nearly over, and it is a good time for some housekeeping on my blog. I wanted for a long time to sort out the photos that I added to my posts as photo galleries.


    I did some of it today. There are currently three galleries:


    Naked @ the beach:

    https://www.imjudas.com/nudebeachcolor


    Naked in my apartment:

    https://www.imjudas.com/indoorscolor


    Naked @ the beach (b&w):

    https://www.imjudas.com/nudebeachmono


    You can also access the galleries from the new photos page, reachable from the main menu or the toolbar (see image):

    I also wanted to do a video summary for 2019, but I settled for a much shorter version.


    2019 was the year in which I learned how to deal with my disability. I am 30% disabled due to neurological damage to the right side of my brain. It happened in November of 2018, and I first noticed it at the nude beach.


    Ironic when I think about it. That the place I love the most was where I realized something terrible was happening with my brain.


    Sunday at noon, I felt it happening but ignored it.


    • Sunday, that afternoon at the beach, I realized I could no longer use my camera.

    • Monday evening, I joked with my friends that I am working too hard, and this is why something is wrong with me.

    • Tuesday, at 9 PM, my parents convinced me that I should go to the E.R. at once.

    • That midnight, I had my diagnostic, and my life collapsed into a black hole.

    • Wednesday, at noon, I was back at the hospital and started my six months of hell. Tests, and more tests, doctors of all kinds and sizes, hurting my body.


    And of course, never-ending tears.


    This is why I created this short video to summarize the beach season of 2019.


    While watching the video I could see the deep sadness in my eyes, and the quiet reflection in my body language of what has happened to me.


    But I also saw in my eyes a determination to keep on living and enjoying life. It took a lot of work but eventually, I regained my freedom, my nudity, and my sexuality.


    The neurological doctor told me last year I have a 25% chance in the next five years (now four) that the rest of my brain will blow up.


    Well, Doctor, I don’t live my life according to statistics.


    I live my life according to my plans.


    And I plan to live my life not as if tomorrow is my last day, but as if today is my first day, and everything is brand new and exciting.


    I dare to live!


    -dec2019 -2019